Ee Soon’s

Today,

  I am not feeling happy today.

  I am unhappy today.

  I am not angry nor sad, just not happy.

  Do not ask me why, because I don’t even know why am I feeling this way.

  Thanks for stopping by and look at these sentences.

  Thanks for spending your 3 minutes to read this.

  I am not happy still.

End of today.

** Tomorrow is the day!! Remember the one I’ve wrote about teaching aerobic dance to a group of student for performance…? Yep! Tomorrow is the day! Hope everything goes well… I mean WELL well.**

  The day is coming. After all the hard work and non-stop practising… 2 more days!! It is coming…

  Whoaa..?

  … ar.. ha!

  emm…

 yup .. …

 hmm…

  so, 2 days later.

  hmm… so, I did not spank myself yesterday instead, I’ve some sleep and done my assignment on time and able to had a little revision before my exams.

  So, I have done all my modules now. I do not need to go to night classess anymore! I am free at night. Oh~ the freedom~ the free time~ so now I have it back!! Muaha! … and so… ?

  I was doing last minute job yesterday and at last, I manage to done my report at 9.20am this morning. My exam starts at 10am. WOW huh? hmm… ya… So I went to the college immediately after I done my assignment. And during driving, guess what? I’ve done my revision while driving eh! haha.. so dangerous but it works. Notes does enter my brain. I’ve done the revision. Once I reach the college, everyone was studying like they never read before, hahaha. Within 5 minutes, I was in the exam room and the examiner was distributing exam paper…

  5 sections need to be done in 2 hours. 21 subjective questions, 10 objective questions and 10 “matching” questions need to be answered in 2 HOURS!!! HELL! So many questions to be answered, so little time given… I nearly missed out some questions… but at last, manage to finish all the questions on time. Pass up the paper without checking it. Feel so rush! Once I step out from the exam room, I heard one of my classmate said “pass up on Monday. Monday is the last day…” I was like… WHaa? Assignment’s due date is on Monday and I was rushing like hell and missed my revision???

  After the exam, I am having those complicated feeling again. Different feeling all come once and I feel so complicated and I am struggling inside (my heart). My tears drop immediately after I received another news from my lecturer… but thanks to the lecturer, I feel better after the dropping of tears. Feels like all those complicated feeling has gone with the tears.

  What news made my tears drop off? hmm… kinda long story… don’t want to share now, maybe’ll share it next time when I have mood to do so.

  Conclusion, today is a rush day for me, a lucky day too somehow. I’ve done my modules, all my modules for diploma course!!! What left now is my practicum and also community service. After that, I will be totally free. This makes be fear somehow…

  Thanks to everyone for wishing me luck and supported me by words. Those words are actually motivating me! Thank you so so much, my friends. I love you, all of you.

  Going to celebrate my cousin sister’s birthday later~ see ya! Cheers~~~

  What’s so complicated?

  I am taking my final exams for my diploma course tomorrow. I have an undone assignment which need to be done and pass up tomorrow. I am not studying any notes for tomorrow’s exams. I am feeling very down, very numb, a bit sad…

  I have mix feeling now. I call it “complicated feel”. I am happy yet I am sad. I am gaining my freedom yet I feel lost. I am suppose to be stress up but yet I am feeling relax. I should finish up my assignment now as it has to pass up tomorow but yet my TV is on + I am viewing FB + friendster + blogging + trance… I am feeling so so lazy right now although I know I shouldn’t have this feeling at this minute..

  Wake me up somebody… Now I am blaming the rain for my not-so-happy-feeling and not-so-good-mood… Someone… please wake me up… I need a spank, a BIG one to wake me up! I allow u… anyone… please spank me. Thanks, I said to u.

  Why am I feeling so down now?? Why? Can’t found the reason… I am so so demotivate now… I do not have any feeling on completing anything right now.

  Spank me please…

  My patient has lost. The level of understanding and accepting one and other’s difference is dropping. My love to children has reduced. The passion for children’s education has decrease… I feel like I am tired with my job!! I am impatient!!!!! What happen to me?

  Recently I found that my level of tolerance, rational thinking and patient has decrease. I do not tolerant to things that I can’t accept even though it’s just a tiny little thinggie… I do not know why, how and when this happen. I make decision very quickly without taking time for rational thinking… and I am impatient! Can’t wait and easily feel angry when things aren’t going as my way. Am I having PMT/PMS? oh…. what happen…

  I an feeling a bit heaten up now! Suddenly feel like my anger is coming… what happen to me???? AAAAAAAAaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!!!! CRAZY!!

  I know I love being busy, I really do. But… I am exhausted now… very very tired… I know I mumble sometimes but it does not mean I don’t like it, I still love being busy! haha~ And you know what? I am happy with this busy lifestyle.

  So now I am actually rushing for… assignments and my work in school. Just let me put in points. 

my studies:

1. I need to do 2 interviews.
2. write 3 reports.
3. prepare 1 presentation.
4. do 2 case study.
5. find articles - 2 topics.
6. study for exam - 2 subjects.
7. attend weekday class (at night).
8. attend weekend class (whole day).

my job/work:

1. finish mathematics syllabus in 2 weeks.
2. plan projects for 4 classes, each day 1 project conduct.
3. teach 8 children to master an aerobic dance in 6 days.
4. prepare exam paper for students.

  Oh~ I love being busy. Other than studies and work… what else?

my personal/private time:

1. prepare lunch, have lunch
2. prepare dinner, have dinner
3. take bath.
4. wash clothes.
5. dry the clothes (hang clothes)
6. online check fb.
7. write blog.
8. practise aerobic dance (to teach my 8 students)
9. sleep

  Aaaaaaaaahhhh exhausted… but I am very satisfy with this lifestyle! Muahaha~ Happy happy~ tired ahhhhhhh… If you found me mumbling here and there, I am actually releasing my tiredness and stress~

  Oohhh…. zzzz… I am feeling fatique.. tired… exhausted…. Muaahahahahaaaaaa.   goodnight..zzzzzz.zzzz…zz..z…zzz………

  Due to the ulcer I have on my tongue, I have restrict myself from eating solid food. Everytime I open my mouth, I feel pain. Everytime when I talk, my tongue moves and I feel pain. Whenever I swallow my sliver, my tongue moves and I feel pain. Munching will automatically moves my mouth, tongue and teeth right!? How am I going to eat without munching? Can’t right?

  The point is, I did not eat solid food for 2 days d! Wow huh? I am very hungry!!!!! I am just like a kid, avoid eating just to escape the pain. This is the 1st time I restrict myself from food due to an ULCER!? Since when I become so weak? So scare of pain? Hmm… if it grows in other place, it won’t be a big deal for me. The problem is, it is growing at the side of my tongue! Haiyo!!! The side of the tongue always rubbing the teeth right? Even you yawn also tongue will rub the teeth… you imagine la… got one ulcer on that place… PAIN!!!!!!

  k la, I know I am making this like very big deal… like a kid ma… I know… I have no idea too why do I act like that. No idea at all.

  Tomorrow will be the 3rd day living without eating solid food. Wohoho~~ I can’t wait to eat after tomorrow!! I am sure my ulcer will be cure after tomorrow! It’s time to be gone!! I know! I am sure!! Because I am hungry!!!! I miss munching food!!!!

  What can I have??? I can’t munch!! can’t even swallow my sliver… What can I have to fill up my hunger? what what what… I am hungry…

  What have I done in these 2 months? Let me put in points (in random order).

1. gain weight.
2. bought lots of comic books.
3. attend friend’s brother’s wedding dinner.
4. drive to KL using map only!!! me! yes! and did not turn onto the wrong road for the 1st time.
5. bought a beautiful cloth with RM10 and feel satisfied.
6. have exams.
7. made a story book named [ Jerry and Dragonflies ].
8. went book fair.
9. bought books from book fair (mostly comic).
10. went to counselling seminar.
11. attend Play Therapy workshop.
12. know few teachers from few primary schools.
13. went out with great friends~
14. watch midnight movie~
15. capture some picture of me~
16. teaching…
17. studying…
18. done a puppet show~
19. being very lazy.
20. being praised by lecturer during presentation.
21. finish my assignment without the help of internet~
22. miss a lot of friends~
23. suprise that my cousin sister is getting married!!! NEXT WEEK!?
24. watch cartoon~
25. made sandwich
26. spent more than RM40 on a meal…
27. have sushi in sake sushi.
28. publish blog post…

  Wohoho~ did I missed anything? If I do, will update it later. tata~